Bullying

Bullying is behaviour that hurts someone else. It includes name calling, hitting, pushing, spreading rumours or threatening someone.

It can happen anywhere – at school, college or university, at home, online or in the workplace. It's often repeated over a long period of time, but it can also be a one-off.

If you're being bullied, it can be a horrible feeling, but there are things you can do - don't ever just accept it and think it will go away.

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Our Experiences

By young people, for young people

"With LGBTQ plus, loads of people tend to be bullied. In fact, I was walking in a hallway a few months ago and loads of people made some really bad homophobic comments. I reported it. Teachers did a little bit about it, not much though. And my friends have been bullied and had homophobic comments.

"It was just uncomfortable. But I managed to sort it out and if they did continue, I just ignored it. I talked to family and, at this point they didn't know, but when I told them they were very supportive and they gave me loads of advice and the bullying stopped.

"It took a long process for the bullying to stop. If you keep telling the teachers and everything, they will do something about it. Maybe go on some websites as well because they can help."

Freya, Age 14

(Some names changed to protect people's identities)

All You Need to Know

Bullying can include:
- Being called names, teased or humiliated.
- Posting, commenting on or liking nasty photos, videos or posts about you online.
- Being pushed, hit or hurt.
- Having money and other stuff stolen.
- Spreading rumours or starting group chats about you.
- Being ignored, left out or made to feel like you're not wanted.
- Being threatened, intimidated or sent nasty messages.
- Trolling you or commenting on your posts or pictures saying nasty things.
- Someone revealing personal details without your permission.
- If someone’s harassing or bullying you online, report it on the site or app. Don't reply to abusive messages or posts as this can make things worse.
- Keep a diary of what's been happening and when, and take screenshots of online messages to help you prove what's been happening.
- If you’re being bullied by people at school, college or university, they will support you. If you have screenshots or evidence of what's been happening, show them to the person supporting you.
- Stand up for yourself without being aggressive. It can help you feel more confident and in control when someone's bullying you.
- Talk to an adult you trust so they can help you to find ways to stop the bullying.
- If you are being bullied online, take a break from your phone or device. You'll still need to get help, but a bit of space can make you feel calmer.
- Do something to make yourself feel better - play a game, read a book or spend time with a friend or on a hobby. Playing sport and going for a walk or a run can also help.
Make sure they know they are not alone and you are on their side.

If you see or hear them being bullied, stand up to the person bullying them, if you feel safe to do so. Be calm and firm and never use violence.

Encourage them to keep a note of what happens and take screenshots of bullying messages.

If the bullying is at school, college or university, speak to an adult who can deal with it. They should also help you find out more about how your setting handles bullying.

If the person being bullied is at risk of injury by the bully or you think they are going to harm themselves and you cannot find an adult, call 999.
Bullying someone else isn’t okay. But if you’re doing it and want to stop, there are things you can do:
- Accept what you're doing is bullying - it's not just a joke and it's not okay because other people are doing it.
- If you've sent bullying posts or messages, delete them and don't send any more.
- Leave any group chats which are bullying someone.
- Apologise to the person you bullied. They might not want to talk to you, so respect that and leave them alone.
- Talk to other people involved in the bullying and ask them to stop.
- Learn from it - think about how you can behave differently in the future.
- If you still have feelings which make you want to bully someone, speak to an adult and ask for help.
Cyber bullying can happen through social media, gaming or through your phone and it should be taken as seriously as face-to-face bullying.

What can make it even more scary is that the person doing the bullying is able to hide their identity.

You can take steps to protect yourself from cyberbullying:
- Block or report anyone who makes you feel uncomfortable online.
- Don't spend time looking at content which makes you feel bad about yourself.
- Be careful when sharing personal information online.
- Speak to a trusted adult for help.
How to report cyberbullying

Who Can Help?

You can talk to your parents or carers, or a trusted adult within your school or setting, or any trusted friend.

Kooth offers online counselling, advice and emotional well-being support 7 days a week until 10pm.

MAP Norfolk can give free and confidential support, information and advice on issues such as housing, money and mental health. You can call 01603 766994 or email info@map.uk.net.

If you live in Norfolk:

If you're 11-19 you can text ChatHealth on 07480 635060 for anonymous and confidential advice and guidance from a health professional. Chat Health is available Monday to Friday 9am - 5pm.

You can also contact the Norfolk Healthy Child Programme by calling Just One Number on 0300 300 0123. Our opening hours are 8am-6pm Monday-Friday (excluding bank holidays) and 9am-1pm on Saturdays.

If you live in Waveney:

You can call the Suffolk School Nursing service on 0345 607 8866 or email childrenshealth@suffolk.gov.uk.

Urgent Mental Health Support

For 24/7 immediate advice, support and signposting for anyone with mental health difficulties please contact 111 and select the mental health option.

If you feel someone's life is at risk or they cannot be kept safe, call 999 or go to A&E.